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Tana Marie's Monthly Romance Column and Love Tip Newsletter

By Tana Marie

Dream Creation

Happy New Year dear friends! My wish is that 2004 offers you accomplished goals, fulfilled dreams, authentic love and boundless joy.

As we stand on the threshold of a New Year, certain themes seem to be on the hearts and minds of almost everyone; Resolutions, New Beginnings and Do-Overs. Every New Year gives us the opportunity to do it right – no matter what “it” is. Once again we choose.

• Is there a love relationship you want to create or get on track?



• Do you want to deepen or enhance the one you’re currently in?



• Is there someone who “got away” and you’d love to reconnect with him or her?



• Or is the goal or do-over related to career, body image, health, finances, forgiveness or some other issue?



• No matter what the desire, the same rules apply to creating “it”.



• Do we hang on to the past, or embrace the future with optimism and anticipation? Hopefully it is the latter. In order to have a future worth getting excited about, the first thing that has to be done is to get a clear picture of the desired outcome. Now I’m not talking about the old mundane goal setting regimen; there are a myriad of books on the topic of Goal Setting, and I highly recommend them if you are a newbie to basic goal setting. (Also check out our Love Tips this month, because it gives you a few effective goal-setting tools) What I’m talking about is creating what you want from a very different place than typical goal setting, I call it “Dream Creation.”
  
  Dream Creation is fundamentally different than standard resolutions or goal setting because it is a deep seated longing, desire or drive that originates from deep inside the person. It has nothing to do with “shoulds” or the “oh gee, wouldn’t that be nice?” goals.
  
  Have you ever noticed that most goals or resolutions usually originate from the head, not the heart? “It would be great if I got a new job,” “lost a few pounds,” “began to exercise,” “learned investment techniques” or…..…; the list goes on. Not that any of these goals are without substantial merit, but if the reason you set them is because someone else told you to, or you absently say “I should,” you’re not creating from your heart or authentic self.
  
  So how do you actually set and attain anything using the Dream Creation technique?
  
  First you have to know specifically what you want and why. NO, NOT the “why” because you’d look good in that new car, or have more money in your pocket, or wear a smaller dress/pant size. It’s the WHY that paints a crystal clear picture of the desired outcome and specifically how attaining it would enhance the quality of your life and the lives of those around you.
  
  Secondly, you have to know the Feeling you’ll have once you accomplish your authentic desire. You have identified the What and Why, so now you need to get a visceral feeling of what your life will be like once you have it. Is this step important? Imperatively so! When we create anything, either positive or negative, we first create through our feelings, then secondly through our intellect. Ever notice how quickly you create something you have strong feelings about?
  
  If you want to be wealthy, is it the desire to obtain lots of little pieces of paper with pictures of dead Presidents on them that drives you? Wrong motivation! However, if you know with utmost certainty that creating more money would allow you to go to college, help your family, start a foundation, make some else’s dreams come true, or any of a million other altruistic reasons for creating wealth and prosperity, then you’re definitely on the right track. Add to it the feeling of giving selflessly and you’re there!
  
  If you’re single and want a love relationship, WHY do you want it? If it’s because you’re tired of sitting around on a Saturday night with nothing to do, and having someone there might end the boredom, then you’re not creating from your heart. If, instead you feel you could contribute to the happiness and well being of another, know you bring a lot to the relationship table, or by obtaining this desire would make you a more loving person by allowing you to express affection and caring, then your heart is in the right place.
  
  Sidebar: This brings up a very interesting point; typically men go into a relationship for what is, while women go into a relationship for what will be. Men get upset when things change; women get upset when they don’t.
  
  Make sure you know what you’re getting into and that you’re happy with 90% of who the person is from the beginning. Not doing so simply isn’t smart and usually ends badly!
  
  Dream Creation will assure you obtain and sustain the experiences, feelings and tangible items that most accurately reflect who you are and what you want your life to represent.
  
  Here is a series of questions that will help keep you on track well into the future.
  
  Taking Present Authentic Goals Into The Future

  What will be important concerning my success? What will I do to insure I experience it authentically?

  What will be important concerning my intimate relationships? What will I do to insure I experience it authentically?

  What will be important concerning my job or career? What will I do to insure I experience it authentically?

  What will be important concerning my security? What will I do to insure I experience it authentically?

  What will be important concerning my health? What will I do to insure I experience it authentically?

  
  
  
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